Leveraging Relational Intelligence

📘 Just finished "Relational Intelligence" by Dharius Daniels

💡 Our ability to build the life we want is directly tied to your ability to steward the people in your life well.

This book teaches that relationships are not one-size-fits-allbthey require discernment, boundaries, honesty, and intentional action.

Here’s my key takeaways, questions to consider, and a practical action step 👇

🤝 1️⃣ Friends

🔹 Takeaway: Friends offer mutual love, honesty, and emotional support.
❓ Question: Are my friendships marked by trust and truth?
👉 Action: Evaluate friendships based on the above and clarify who is truly a "friend" and who needs to be reassigned

👥 2️⃣ Associates

🔹 Takeaway: Associates share proximity or purpose, not intimacy.
❓ Question: Am I expecting too much from an associate?
👉 Action: Adjust expectations to match the role.

🎯 3️⃣ Assignments

🔹 Takeaway: Some relationships exist for growth, development, or a season.
❓ Question: Am I trying to turn an assignment into a friendship?
👉 Action: Clarify boundaries and purpose in this relationship.

🧭 4️⃣ Advisors

🔹 Takeaway: Advisors provide wisdom, perspective, and restraint.
❓ Question: Who challenges me and helps me avoid costly mistakes? Am I coachable?
👉 Action: Seek, thank, or listen more closely to an advisor.

🪞 5️⃣ Reflection

🔹 Takeaway: Relational clarity begins with honest self-reflection.
❓ Question: What am I feeling and why?
👉 Action: Journal before reacting emotionally.

🔍 6️⃣ Evaluation

🔹 Takeaway: Feelings and fruit reveal the health of relationships.
❓ Question: Are my relationships producing growth or frustration?
👉 Action: Evaluate the fruit, not just the feelings.

🧠 7️⃣ Clarification

🔹 Takeaway: Unspoken expectations create resentment.
❓ Question: What expectation have I failed to communicate?
👉 Action: Clearly articulate what you need or expect.

🤲 8️⃣ Acceptance

🔹 Takeaway: Accept people for who they are not who you wish they were.
❓ Question: Am I trying to change someone instead of accepting reality?
👉 Action: Release unrealistic expectations.

🗣️ 9️⃣ Advocation

🔹 Takeaway: Healthy relationships include support and advocacy.
❓ Question: Am I speaking for people or about them?
👉 Action: Advocate for someone when they’re not in the room.

💬 🔟 Conversation

🔹 Takeaway: Growth requires honest, courageous conversations.
❓ Question: What conversation am I avoiding?
👉 Action: Schedule the conversation instead of postponing it.

🚧 1️⃣1️⃣ Limitations

🔹 Takeaway: Limits protect emotional and mental health.
❓ Question: Where do I need stronger boundaries?
👉 Action: Set one limit and honor it consistently.

✂️ 1️⃣2️⃣ Elimination

🔹 Takeaway: Some relationships require distance for peace and health.
❓ Question: Is this relationship costing me more than it’s giving?
👉 Action: Create space where necessary without guilt.

🪞 1️⃣3️⃣ What Kind of Friend Are You?

🔹 Takeaway: Healthy relationships start with personal responsibility.
❓ Question: Am I the kind of friend I want others to be?
👉 Action: Identify one character trait you need to strengthen.

🧩 1️⃣4️⃣ A Model for Healthy Relationships

🔹 Takeaway: Healthy relationships require clarity, honesty, and alignment.
❓ Question: Are my relationships intentionally structured or accidental?
👉 Action: Re-map your relational circle intentionally.

📊 1️⃣5️⃣ How’s It Going?

🔹 Takeaway: Relationships need ongoing check-ins and adjustments.
❓ Question: What needs attention right now?
👉 Action: Do a relational audit this month.

💬 Final Thought:

Relational intelligence isn’t about cutting people off. It’s about putting people in the right place and respecting the roles and boundaries you set for each relationship category.

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